


Man of Constant Sorrow

by Scarlet_Gryphon



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Barry Bluejeans Dies Repeatedly, Canon Temporary Character Death, Canonical Character Death, F/M, Gen, Hurt/Eventual Comfort, The Lonely Decade, There will be a happy ending, eventually
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-07
Updated: 2019-07-04
Packaged: 2020-01-05 23:56:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 16,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18376709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scarlet_Gryphon/pseuds/Scarlet_Gryphon
Summary: We know what happened with the others during the Lonely Decade, but of the Seven Birds, Barry Bluejeans' time alone is the most unknown.





	1. Year Zero: I've seen trouble all my days

**Author's Note:**

> Any recognizable dialogue is (c) The McElroys/The Adventure Zone.

Barry has been standing on the deck of the Starblaster for... Gods, he's not sure. Far too long, most likely. He and Taako have been searching for Lup for what's felt like decades rather than just months. He wishes for so many things- to finally find Lup, to know why she left without a proper goodbye, to not see Taako walking around like a pale ship-bound imitation of himself... Barry's pretty sure he looks just as bad off, and is just as sure he's lost more weight than is particularly healthy for him because of the stress.

He stares down at the map pinned to the table, his eyes grainy and heavy with exhaustion. Eventually Barry finds himself dozing off with his head cradled in his hands, startling awake only when he hears Taako's voice calling out to him from nearby.

“How's it goin'?”

“Oh sorry, I- sorry, so, um, anyway, there’s a… there's a dungeon out beyond the Felicity Wilds? It's a… subterranean… demonic keep… thing. There’s a bunch of arcane energy coming off of it. I was gonna check it out tonight, if you wanna come with,” Barry says, scrubbing a hand over his face. It's rough with stubble and starting to almost grow out to a full beard. He hasn't been bothered to shave much since Lup left, his standards slipping to the point where he'll take a shower and eat when Taako bullies him into it, but not much more than that.

“Yeah, where were- where were- remind me, how far is that in relation to the last glassing?” Taako asks.

Barry sighs. “Um, I've triangulated it here,” he replies, pointing out the spot on the map. Taako nods, looking it over for a moment.

“Yeah, it seems like a good a place as any. Do you want to do the usual: I’ll go down and start casting around, see if I can pick up anything, and then- you start talking to folks?”

“Yep. That’s uh, I mean it hasn’t worked so far, but… it’s gotta work one of these times.” Barry stares down at the map, his heart heavy. Before he can stop himself, words tumble out of his mouth that have been circulating in his brain for the past few weeks but which he's never been brave enough to voice before. “T-Taako, what if she's just gone?”

“Who?”

That catches Barry's attention like nothing else. He whips his head up, staring wide-eyed at Taako. He can feel-- His mind starts to get foggy as he begins to forget, and that's when he knows that something's seriously wrong. It's a whirl after that, and Barry barely has time to process that Taako has actually attacked him before the rail of the deck breaks behind him and he's falling to his death, his thoughts fading faster and faster as--

 

Barry

 

Falls

 

 _Down_.

 

He's dead before he hits the ground; it's a small mercy (dying by high impact is never a fun way to go), but one he'll take. Barry's lich form slowly rises up from his body, red arcs of magic briefly escaping his control before he shudders and pulls himself back together, almost literally. He looks up at the sky in search of the ship but the Starblaster is nowhere to be seen, clouds and the cloaking wards they'd installed after Lucretia's horrible year along on the Plane of Judgment hiding it from view. He turns back to his body and stares at it contemplatively, pondering his options. Staying out in the open won't do him any good, especially if he wants to stay off the radar of the Raven Queen and Her reapers.

Even though technically he's an archlich, Barry's pretty sure a reaper won't take the time needed to actually _look_ at his magic-infused soul long enough to see that it's free of the usual corruption lichdom normally brings. Barry sighs heavily before conjuring a glass vial and collecting some of his blood and a bit of his flesh. He immediately places half a dozen preservation and anti-breaking spells on it so nothing can happen to it. Barry takes one last thing from his body before he hits it with a ray of Disintegrate and turns it into a pile of gray dust: the gently scuffed and scratched gold band that rests on his left ring finger.

He and Lup have been married several times over, the first time during an early cycle where the Material Plane they'd landed on had valued strong bonds in their trading partners, and several times after the two of them had become liches. At first it was a test to make sure that they wouldn't be hurt by holy magics, but after that it had become a way to inject some levity into an otherwise potentially terminally depressing existence. Their marriage on this plane had been before the Relic Wars truly kicked off, the ceremony performed in a quiet temple of Istus in Neverwinter.

Barry puts the vial and ring safely away in a demiplane before going to find a safe place to spend the night. He eventually holes up in an abandoned barn, holding tight to his ring and hoping like hell this will be over soon. He doesn't sleep, not in this form, but he lets his mind drift to memories of happier days.

The next few months prove fraught with trouble. Using some of the information he and Taako had gleaned during their search for Lup, Barry finds an auction of unsavory magical artifacts. Originally he goes to see if there's any sign of the Gauntlet or Lup, but while he's there, he purchases a vessel imbued with the Clone spell. It's better than making his own, and while he's pretty sure he won't remember anything once he eventually inhabits his new body, Barry doesn't care. He'll find a way to orient himself.

Once he's gotten his prize safely stowed away in his demiplane, Barry goes to ground, finding a crypt near Phandalin that's overrun by gerblins. It's a little cruel, he supposes, wiping them all out so he can have a place to stay and plot and plan, but then again, so is fracturing your whole family and scattering them to the winds. Barry sets everything up, warding the cave to the Astral Plane and back against any forms of Divination, scrying, and other methods of detection. He wards it against the agents of the Raven Queen as well, not wanting a reaper to interrupt his work.

The final thing Barry does is start up the Clone pod, putting the precious blood and flesh he'd gathered into it and then activates the spell. The pod magically fills with a brackish green liquid that glows from within. Barry stares at it for a long while as he contemplates what must be done. Eventually, he shakes his head and turns towards the table he's set up with a map of Faerûn.

There's work to be done.

 


	2. Year One: Bound To Ramble

The pod's doors slide open with a hiss, releasing a tide of green liquid that disappears thanks to a circle of runes that have been carved into the stone of the cave floor. The figure that's been suspended within the opaque liquid hits the floor with a grunt, his knees stinging from the harsh and sudden contact. He pushes himself up on shaky arms, his vision obscured first by the liquid that he wipes from his eyes and then, after a few moments of blinking, his apparent mild natural nearsightedness. 

Pushing himself up off the floor, he stumbles over to a nearby table where a fat beeswax candle is burning in a deep metal bowl that's collecting the melted wax for reuse later. A nearby letter catches his attention, making him pick it up. After all, it's addressed to him, so why shouldn't he?

 

_ Barry-- _

_ I know this seems weird, but I'm you from about five minutes ago. You won't remember writing this letter, but that's okay. Your name is Barry J. Bluejeans. Your mother was Marlena and your father was Gregor. There's a weight in your chest that belongs to the center of your world, and Barry, that's who we're going to go look for. There are clothes in the chest to your right, but there's something more important on the table in front of you. Put the ring there on your left ring finger. The person who's wearing its match is out there somewhere. Her name is Ļ̛̖̞̗̳̱̗͇͊̆̓̓͠u̧̨̞̻̲͈̘̍͂̂͒̑̊͂͒͢p̰̭̠̥̻̫̺͔̅̿̇͂͋̑͟, and she's one of the best people we have ever known. _

_ You're a wizard, so that'll help some. I'm not sure what spells you'll remember, but there are several spell-books around that you can use to study up before you head out. Your memory is... Well, I'm not sure how it'll be, to be honest, but probably not the best. All you need to remember really is your name, the fact that you can do magic, and to keep an eye out for an elf with a red robe and an umbrastaff. There's a wand that should work for you on the table to your left. My advice would be to start in the area around Phandalin. _

_ That should be about it. Don't forget the glasses; they're kind of important. Took me a while to get the right prescription since I couldn't exactly-- Never mind. You don't care about that. Oh, and before you go, put a little blood in the bottom of the pod you came out of and then close it up before pushing the big red rune on the main panel. I hope to the gods that it won't be necessary, but who knows what fate has in store for the future? _

_ I wish you-- us –luck. _

_ Gods know we'll need it. _

 

Barry reads it over twice more before putting on the glasses and ring as instructed, feeling a little better now that he can see properly. Even with the glasses, though, he can't quite parse one of the words in the letter. Having the slight weight of the ring on his hand feels familiar and _right_ , which is weird, because he's never thought of a ring having significant weight to it before, and yet this one does. With a shrug, Barry gets dressed, finding more comfort in the simple but sturdy clothes that're in the cedar chest nearby. Underwear, bluejeans, a white cotton shirt, a studded leather belt – all of it feels almost like he's donning another layer of armor with each piece, until he's lacing his boots over his socks and then sliding on a long dark gray coat that feels... Not quite _wrong_ , but definitely not entirely right. He's not sure what's the matter with it, though. 

He shakes the slight unease from his head, hissing softly at the headache that it sparks, and then pokes around the cave some more. There's a bedroll laid out on a pallet on the ground in seeming preparation for him, as well as a well-stocked pack with all the essentials an adventuring mage might need and more besides. Barry steadies himself and then looks outside, shoulders slumping when he sees that it's night. He'll have to wait until it's morning to set out, but until then, he can read up on the spells he apparently knows and refresh his very spotty memory.

Barry takes his shoes and belt off, settling in on the bedroll with a lower-level spell book in hand. Eventually he dozes off over it in the wee hours of the morning, using the book as a convenient pillow even though there's an actual pillow at hand. He wakes with a massive crick in his neck and a page stuck to his cheek. He has to carefully peel it off before he can properly sit up. Barry has no idea what time it is, and figures one of his first things should be to get a watch of some kind if he's going to be traveling or staying here for much longer.

Once he feels ready and he's put some blood in the tank and started it, Barry grabs the pack, the wand that's sitting on the desk tucked into the enchanted wand holster on his right wrist, and then heads out. He's glad for the wide-brimmed hat that he has on his head and the oilskin cloak around his shoulders, as it's pouring buckets outside thanks to a summer storm that's come in overnight. He refers to the waterproof map that shows roughly where he's at and then heads in Phandalin's general direction, hoping he can find whoever it is he's looking for. 

His wife, he assumes, given the letter, which he supposes makes sense. Barry's mind goes dangerously fuzzy if he tries to think on it for longer than a few seconds, so he tries not to. His unconscious mind seems to like to focus on it, though, bringing him half-formed dreams of warm laughter, snippets of blonde hair flying around a blurred face, and a general feeling of an overwhelming and all-encompassing love. It leaves him waking with a sense of loss and longing, one that settles in his chest like an old bruise against his breastbone.

He has to force himself not to rub at it, though he can't always keep from doing it, especially at night when he's camping alone and in the dark. When he finally gets to Phandalin, Barry gets a room at the inn. He's not entirely sure how to start his search or where, but he figures that the inn will make for a good base of operations for the time being nonetheless.

A few days later and Barry's combing the foothills around Phandalin for any sign, for _something_ that will lead him to his goal. It's scorching now, one of the last of the truly hot summer days before the seasons turn and fall brings its cooler temperatures. Barry wipes away trails of sweat from his face. The letter doesn't say what, exactly, the signs will be, but apparently he'll know it when he sees it, which, not exactly helpful. 

The rocks and scree shift under his boots, making the footing particularly treacherous. Barry presses on, using what handholds he can find to help keep his balance. It's slow going, but he figures that if he can get up high enough, then maybe he can see some sort of obvious landmark and go from there. He reaches for a handhold but before he can readjust and keep climbing, the handhold gives way. There's no time to grab on to something else as the rocks shift beneath him and suddenly he's falling, the feeling of air rushing past him and the impending collision of the ground strangely familiar and--

Darkness.

Barry slowly sits up from his broken body, taking in an entirely unneeded breath before letting out a scream of rage, his cursing echoing off the nearby cliff walls. It'll be another four months before he can try this again, before he can move freely around the world again without _her_ trying to find him. Barry struggles to get a hold on himself, shoving his anger away to the back of his mind where he can refine it into something more useful. 

With a wave of his hand, he strips his corpse of everything that's on it, wedding band included, and then Disintegrates it. If he's going to be doing this multiple times, he's not going to leave bodies scattered all across the country. Barry's lived through enough things as it is; he doesn't want to add 'creepy urban legend' to the list or attract the attention of unwanted pursuers.

Leaving the pile of ash behind to be scattered to the wind, Barry stores his things in his demiplane and then heads back to his cave. Letters to himself won't cut it, not if he wants to be more active in guiding his memoryless self around. He'll need something more portable and active, and that means crafting something. 

It's a good thing he has plenty of time.

 


	3. Year Two: No Pleasures Here on Faerûn I've Found

Alayne has seen many things in her days as an adventurer. She's seen crypts filled with walking skeletons, the ruins of long-dead civilizations, and ancient forests that are thousands of years old and will likely last for thousands more. Very little surprises her any more, or so she thinks. She finds a mystery in the man known as Barry J. Bluejeans, though. He seems plain enough upon first glance, with no real defining characteristics that makes him stand out in a crowd. He dresses relatively conservatively, in sturdy dark blue denim pants and boots, a white cotton shirt, and a wide-brimmed hat and oilskin cloak over top. He's married- according to him and the plain gold ring on his left ring finger, anyways -but when pressed about his spouse, he tends to talk in generalities about her, which is a bit odd.

Alayne has been traveling with Barry for a few months, having met up with him when passing through Neverwinter. She wasn't really paying attention at the time, but now she wishes she had. All she'd needed was a good fighter and a solid presence at her side as she traveled, and Barry seemed to have fit the bill for both. Gnomes aren't exactly known for their physical fighting prowess, after all, and it never hurts to have someone of a more... common size on her side.

They're in a tavern at the moment, resting between destinations for a long-term job they've taken on from Craig's List. Barry's two pints of ale in and is slowly working on his third in between eating some food. He occasionally does this, takes a bit of a melancholic turn for no apparent rhyme or reason, but it's not caused them any problems so far so Alayne doesn't mind as long as he does his job well. She idly sips her Redcheek Cider as she observes him, noting the stress lines around his eyes and mouth.

“So,” she says, making Barry startle and look up from his vague contemplation of his mug of half-drunk ale, “think this job will pan out?”

Barry rubs his chin, his stubble rasping against his palm as he does so. “I- I think so,” he replies, leaning back in his chair. He waves a hand absentmindedly. “I mean, finding this artifact is going to be hard, but I have faith we'll get it. Not too wild about dealing with another cave or crypt or whatever, but that's the job.”

Alayne nods. “Yeah,” she agrees. She takes a few more sips of her cider before setting it aside. “Hey, Barry? Mind if I ask a personal question?”

Barry shrugs. “As long as you don't mind me choosing to not answer it.”

“Sure, whatever. Why are you still looking for your wife? I mean, you said yourself that you don't know how long it's been since you've seen her, and you don't even know if she's alive.”

“I...” Barry sighs heavily. “I have to believe she is,” he says eventually. “I know Faerûn's a big place, but I think I'd know if she was dead.”

Alayne eyes him for a long moment. It's nice that he has that sort of unshakable faith, but she's a pragmatist. Faith is all well and good, but she'd rather have proof of something rather than blind trust. Still, maybe a little faith couldn't hurt.

“Maybe you could make an offering to Istus and the Raven Queen,” she suggests. “The Weaver might be able to guide your feet, and the Queen would know if your wife was in Her care. They'll probably have temples for them in the next big city we reach, which I think is Crowsport.”

Barry contemplates that. “I've never really put a lot of stock in the gods, but it couldn't hurt,” he says eventually. “Yeah, sure, why not?”

When they get to town and then settled in at one of the many inns in the bustling port city, Barry finds his way to the area in the Middle District, and more specifically, to the market that's specifically for the offerings meant to be given to the gods. He picks up a pomegranate and an apple, as well as a silver knife, a raven's feather, and, after several minutes' worth of contemplation, a ball of deep red yarn, though he can't say why he picks that particular color.

The two temples share a quiet but airy space, with one half of the small building dedicated to the Raven Queen and the other to Istus. Barry's the only one there at the moment, which suits him just fine. He places his gifts to Istus on one of the offering tables first, cutting the apple and pomegranate into neat halves with the silver knife before setting them on a free area of the platter on top of the table. The ball of yarn is presented next, Barry making sure to unspool the end of the yarn and draping it across the cut fruit.

He puts the Raven Queen's offerings down next, doubting that She'll mind sharing space with Her wife's gifts. The raven feather is placed across the cut fruit before Barry cleans and sanitizes the knife with a spell and then adds seven drops of his blood to each offering after pricking his finger. He sinks down to ground on his knees, feeling a little awkward but forging on nonetheless. He bows his head, almost automatically closing his eyes as he does so.

“I'm not usually much of a praying man,” he murmurs, letting his hands fold together in his lap, “but I'll honestly take any help I can get. I--” He lets out a quiet laugh, the sound rougher than usual. “I don't know a lot about who I am or my place in this world. Hell, I barely can remember my name half the time, but I... I do know that there's some reason why I'm walking around with this weight in my chest, like half my heart has been torn out and then stolen away. I just...”

Barry sighs, one hand coming up to scrub at his face before it drops down into his lap again. “I just want to know if she's alright, if she's _alive_. I don't care if she doesn't remember me, if she's with someone else now or if she's alone. All I care about is her well-being.”

He lifts his head and opens his eyes, looking up at the raven and the spindle icons wrought in iron and silver hanging on the wall above the offering table. “Just... If she's alive and well, watch over her for me? Something tells me that an extra set of eyes or two wouldn't hurt.” 

Barry slowly gets to his feet, cleaning the knife once more before leaving it on the offering table. He turns and leaves the temple, not seeing the flash of white light that surrounds his offerings and then takes them away.

-/-

Far away in the Celestial Plane, in a cozy little cottage in the middle of a meadow, a woman with flowing white hair and constantly but subtly shifting features looks up from Her knitting, Her head cocking to one side before She sets Her work aside, the knitting floating in midair. The needles continue to work without Her input, though perhaps not quite as smoothly as they do in Her hands. 

Istus wanders over to a side table, Her eyebrows rising when She sees what's waiting there. It's been a while since someone has done a more traditional offering to Her and Her wife. Most leave out the drops of blood, thinking it somehow against the rules the Raven Queen has set down regarding life and death. Neither of them have ever minded it, to be honest, and Istus has often missed the older times when She and Her wife were more widely worshiped.

She reaches out and places a hand over the offering, closing Her eyes as She takes in the measure of the prayer and the soul of the person who's made it. The prayer is simple, if not a little rambling, and it makes Istus smile. She can feel the depth of the love in the soul of Barry J. Bluejeans. It runs tightly through it like the warp and weft of a finely woven fabric, providing a bolster against the threat of the constant strain of nervousness and worry She can feel there. 

Istus can also feel how Barry's soul is intrinsically melded with his magic, but it's not in the twisted way of most liches. An archlich is rare enough, particularly amongst humans, but knowing that Barry's built his craft on the depth of his love and bonds with others makes Istus breathe a sigh of relief. She won't have to see any of the Queen's reapers going after him and taking him to the Eternal Stockade. 

Her curiosity getting the better of Her, Istus uses Her ability to follow the threads of Barry's fate back to see if She can find his lost love. Her smile shifts to a frown when she loses the thread almost three years back. It hasn't been snapped, that much She knows, so this... Lup, is it? ...isn't dead. Rather, it's like she's in a different plane of existence where even Istus can't follow her.

She shakes Her head and then moves Her hand away from the offering, letting Her half of the fruit vanish into the æther before She takes the yarn. It's a nice weight, and She bounces it a few times in Her hand before looking into Barry's future. She smiles as She follows the threads of his fate. While yes, there are possibilities that may end in sadness, the one that shines the strongest and brightest is going to be _magnificent_.

-/-

Barry dies in a cave-in two months after he leaves Crowsport. He's separated from Alayne by several tunnels when it happens, which is both good and bad. He rises from his crushed body and goes through the sadly familiar routine of regaining his wedding ring and anything that might be useful, storing it in his demiplane before Disintegrating his corpse. While he doubts anyone can get through the rather impressive blockage the cave-in has created, he doesn't want to take any chances.

Only after he checks to make sure that Alayne hasn't been caught by the cave-in does Barry leave the area and head back towards his cave. He's glad to see that his new body is almost ready to use. Good. He'll have to be more careful this next time. Or maybe... maybe he'll look to see if he can find the rest of his family and check in on them. Gods only know what they've been up to. Barry looks at his body and then picks up the recording coin, pressing the head on one side to start his message to himself.

“Your name is Barry J. Bluejeans, and I'm you from not that long ago...”

 


	4. Year Three: I Have No Friends to Help Me Now

Barry dies early on in the third year of his lonely journey through Faerûn, accidentally running afoul of a chimera near the Felicity Wilds. He barely has time to save his wedding ring and message coin with a clever physical recall spell before the chimera rips his body apart. It saves time and magical power, Barry supposes, but he wishes he didn't have to deal with it in the first place. At least his death was relatively painless this time, as the chimera had managed to tag him with its snake head, its venom paralyzing him before the lion head started in on him.

He shakes his head and then drifts away after storing his belongings in his demiplane, mentally cursing his luck. His new body won't be ready for quite some time- at least another four months –and Barry doesn't really relish the idea of waiting around in his cave for that length of time. He pauses, an idea coming to him. It's been a while since he's tried to find any of the others. He figures if he keeps a low profile and stays out of the visible plane, he should be alright. It'll take some time to follow each of the bonds he's built his lichdom on, but Barry's nothing if not tenacious.

All he needs now is patience and a little luck.

 

-/-

 

He finds Davenport first, tracking him to a small house on the outskirts of Rockport. Barry observes his captain for a good hour and is glad that he's decided to stay out of mortal sight. While Davenport doesn't _look_ any different, he's certainly not the same gnome that Barry last saw on the _Starblaster_. Davenport is... reduced. Reduced from the bright explorer who's fought so fiercely against the Hunger and has led their team for a century through both the bright and the pitch dark. It makes Barry's unseen form shudder.

He stays just long enough to see that Lucretia is with Davenport, and has to push down the surge of twisted satisfaction he gets when he sees that she's looking exhausted and strained. He knows that if the Judges were here to see him and pronounce his crimes, he likely would be having Wrath added to his list.

Barry leaves, but not without putting an obscure tracking charm on his two friends. Hopefully it won't be found before Barry can figure out what's happened to Lup and how to solve the problem they've been fighting against for over a century.

 

-/-

 

Merle is next. Barry finds him wandering on a beach near a thriving seaside Dwarven community, a young girl and a woman roughly Merle's age following him. Barry has to do a double-take to see that, no, there's no way she's young enough to be Merle's biologically-- though, the child that the woman is carrying seems to be. They seem happy enough, though Merle appears somewhat distant both physically and mentally. Barry's not sure if that's because Merle has something on his mind or if he can sense that something isn't quite right with this whole situation.

Barry knows that Merle's attracted pretty much to anything that'll give him the time of day, but before all of this happened, Barry had been sure that Merle and Davenport had been heading somewhere, albeit in a slow and comfortable way that fit the two of them to a tee. He watches Merle for a while and then tags him with the same tracking charm he hit Davenport and Lucretia with before leaving him to his new family.

 

-/-

 

Finding Magnus is as easy as finding the best place in the whole of Faerûn for woodcarving and other crafts. Barry takes a few hours and simply observes Magnus flirting with a half-orc beauty with dark hair who teases him gently about the curves of the rocking chair he's putting together. The quiet intimacy between them speaks of a deep love that Barry is glad Magnus has found. The younger man deserves it as much as any of them do, and Barry can tell this love hasn't been forced or manufactured.

Barry learns in his observation that Magnus' wife is named Julia, that she loves blacksmithing just as much as Magnus loves woodcarving, and has a lovely sense of humor that makes Magnus laugh deep and long. Barry soaks in the atmosphere, feeling almost as if he's back on the _Starblaster_ with the rest of their group during some of the lighter cycles, where the Hunger seemed far away and as distant as a cloud.

He leaves the two them to their work after putting the tracking charm on Magnus, feeling buoyed by what he's seen today. If Magnus can find happiness here, maybe the rest of them can too.

 

-/-

 

Taako takes the longest of them all, and Barry half-hopes that maybe Taako's weird brand of luck has struck again and he's managed to stumble across Lup in the past few years. No such luck, unfortunately. Taako's not alone, though, when Barry finally locates him. He and a scraggly looking human are setting up what looks like a stage-wagon in a town square, a sign on the side of the wagon proclaiming 'Sizzle It Up with Taako!'.

Barry watches the two of them work, keeping unseen as the show is set up and then a crowd begins to gather. Taako's a born showperson and puts his talents to work, soon wowing the townsfolk with his patter and panache. Barry notices that Taako's assistant is watching Taako avidly, but not in an appreciative or educational way. No, he's got a look of jealousy that Barry doesn't like one bit. He's tempted to hit the little weasel with some sort of bad luck spell, but he doesn't want it to affect Taako.

In the end, Barry leaves the man he hears Taako call Sazed alone-- for the most part. He does curse him with temporary incontinence, forcing him to find a convenient bush to hide behind while he deals with his little problem. Barry doesn't let anyone mess with his brother-in-law, not when he can help it. One tracking charm later and Barry starts the long return to his cave, knowing he's been away from its protections for far too long. He's been lucky so far, but he doesn't know if or when that luck will run out.

 

-/-

 

Six months later and Barry's out of a body again, this time losing it to a particularly venomous snake near the Woven Gulch. The damn thing strikes out of nowhere, leaving him writhing on the ground for a blissfully short time before he passes out and then dies. He doesn't kill the snake after he rises from his corpse. It's not the snake's fault, not really. Barry's the one who's intruding on its territory.

He collects his things, tucking them away in the demiplane that's started to collect more and more things in it over the years, and then takes care of his body as usual. When he finally collects himself, Barry realizes that two of his tracking charms have stopped. That makes him freeze for a long moment. The question is, which two?

He starts at the house Davenport and Lucretia were in last, but it's empty, several months' worth of dust laying thick on the floor and other flat surfaces. Barry sighs deeply. Alright, fine. That's a dead end. He can try the three others, in that case.

He finds Merle in a town far from the beach, wedding ring conspicuously absent as he tries-- and fails –to get a few teens of varying species to take a look at the tracts he's trying to pass out about Pan. Barry winces as he watches, trying to match up the dwarf he sees before him to the one who'd planted and led the Church of Fungston. Whatever Lucretia did, it's like she's left Merle a bumbling caricature of the once passionate and eloquent speaker he used to be.

Barry shakes his head in dismay and then leaves, following the next strongest charm. It's at Raven's Roost, but the sight that greets him-- Barry has to cling to his control with all he can when he sees Magnus sifting grimly through the wreckage of the craftsman's corridor, his beloved Julia not at his side. He's never seen Magnus this beat down and looking like he's about ready to lay down and die, not even on the worst cycles they've been through.

He hovers unseen next to Magnus when his friend unearths half a sign reading 'Hammer an-', wishing he could do more as Magnus sinks to his knees and weeps. Barry stays with him for as long as he can, using small bits of magic to help Magnus' macabre job that much easier. When night falls and Magnus retreats, the half-sign still clutched in his rough and bleeding hands, Barry keeps watch over him until he falls asleep next to his campfire.

He knows it's more than a little invasive, but Barry can't help but to cast _Dream_ on his friend and shapes a pleasant nighttime remembrance for Magnus, using his own memories of that pleasant day he'd seen several months ago. Barry draws out of the dream, leaving Magnus to it. Two down, one to go, and Barry has the feeling he's not going to like what he finds.

Taako is at the end of the final charm, alone and curled up in a ragged blanket under a tree with no sight of Sazed or the show wagon. Barry stares at him for a long time, his brother in all but blood barely recognizable. Deep shadows darken Taako's skin under his eyes, a telling sign that he hasn't meditated or slept in quite some time. Two-Sun elves are lucky in that they get to sleep or meditate, while those here on Faerûn seem to only be able to do the latter.

Taako looks like he's been through hell and back, and is just staring out into the darkness, not bothering to warm himself with anything beyond his blanket. Barry knows he can't spell him like he has Magnus-- Taako's too magic-sensitive for that –and he can't do anything with the blanket either, or at least not right then. He waits and watches, keeping an unseen guard over Taako until finally, _finally_ , the elf succumbs to exhaustion and falls asleep.

Barry goes into action then, casting a gentle warming charm on the blanket that'll keep Taako from getting too cold (neither twin likes getting cold, and will layer themselves with blanket upon blanket until all you can see are two pairs of heterochromatic eyes peeking out from under the soft mound). He sets up a ward around the meager campsite that will keep bugs, thieves, and wild animals away, and then finally tucks a brush and a small unmarked bag full of gold pieces into the knapsack that's at Taako's side. It's not much, but it'll see Taako to the nearest town and, hopefully, a proper bed, bath, and new clothes and shoes.

“I am so, _so_ sorry, Taako,” Barry murmurs, his heart breaking even more than he thought possible. “I'll find her. I'll find Lup and then we'll come get you and the others and figure this out. Just... stay safe, alright? Maybe keep an eye out for Merle and Magnus if you can. If... If you remember them.”

He runs a spectral hand over Taako's snarled hair, wishing he can provide more comfort than what he already has.

“I love you, Taako,” he says to the quiet night. “If you never remember anything else, never forget that.”

With one last look at his brother-in-law, Barry leaves, heading back to his cave with a new determination. He's going to keep trying, if not for himself, then for his family. They deserve to be woven back together. He might not be some all powerful cosmic force, but Barry's damn sure going to try.

 


	5. Years Four and Five: Bury Me in Some Deep Valley

Barry lasts another year and half in his next two bodies, which is a new record. He dies first a year and four months in due to severe dehydration and then two months later not to his own stupidity or to a mistake, but to a betrayal from one of the greediest members of his adventuring party. Thankfully-- well, sort of, anyways –the poison affects the rest of the party too, and no one's around to see him rise from his body after the murderer runs off into the depths of the dungeon they've been delving into. Barry contemplates going after the asshole but decides to leave him be. He probably won't get too far on his own, so Barry's not too fussed.

He places two coins in each of his former companions' left hands before he fetches his belongings and then Disintegrates his own body as usual. If the murderer ever comes back, it'll be a hell of a mystery for him to solve, assuming he cares that much. Barry highly doubts it. He eventually finds his way out of the dungeon's labyrinthine halls and out near the peak of the mountain the dungeon's in, pausing when he sees the beautiful first fingers of red and gold in the morning sky.

Barry throws up a set of quick but sturdy wards that'll protect him from most beings, either those of this plane or not. He's not an idiot; Barry is well aware that every second he spends outside of his corporeal form or the protective wards of his hideout means that he can be found, either by _her_ or an agent of the Raven Queen. He figures he has enough time to watch the rest of the sunrise, and the ward he's put up should give him enough time to defend himself and then get away to safety.

Barry takes a seat-- or as close as he can get to one in lich form, anyways -on a large boulder and settles in to watch the sky be slowly but surely painted in vibrant colors.

 

It's entirely purely by luck that Kravitz runs across the lich. He's in the area for an entirely different bounty when he catches the familiar echoes of necrotic magics on the wind. He approaches stealthily, his scythe in hand. Kravitz steps toward the curiously red robed lich to take it into custody when it feels like he runs face-first into a brick wall as previously unseen and undetected wards snap around him, keeping him from going any further. The lich stiffens and then slowly turns on the spot, magical energy crackling around its shadowy hands. It briefly cocks its hooded head like a curious dog before the energy fades away and its posture relaxes somewhat.

“Huh. Well, at least I know _that_ works.” It-- no, _he_ –says. “I wasn't sure if it would work on reapers from this planar system--” The lich shakes his head and then lets out a nervous laugh. “Sorry. Um, I can't let you, y'know, drag me off to the Eternal Stockade or whatever it's called here. I've got a lot to do and to work on, and if it helps, I'm technically an archlich. No mortal sacrifices or pacts with the Infernal or anything like that. I don't know how, uh, how close you'd have to be to check that, though, and I really don't want to be reaped or anything? So the ward's gonna have to stay. Sorry, bud.”

Kravitz has heard many things come out of a lich's mouth, but an apology? That's a first for him. To be honest, the lich in front of him radiates a sort of nervous apologetic energy, almost as if he's sorry for inconveniencing him rather than for being an affront to the Raven Queen's laws of life and death. Kravitz shakes off his confusion and then pokes his scythe at the shimmering barrier. It holds, something that Kravitz find both impressive and annoying.

“I don't care about your lies,” he says, automatically slipping into his 'work voice' as he speaks to the lich. “You will stand before the Raven Queen and-”

“Y-yeah, sorry, that's not gonna-” The lich laughs roughly. “That's not gonna work for me. I, uh... I'm sorry about this.”

Before Kravitz can respond, the lich Banishes him back to the Astral Plane. The sixty seconds that it takes for the spell to return him to the Prime Material Plane is enough time for the lich to have left the area, the faint tingle of teleportation lingering in the air. Kravitz growls at that, as while technically he has the ability to get anywhere he wants with his scythe, he has to have at least some sort of lock on a bounty, and since he has no idea who the lich is, he can't track him down.

Kravitz huffs sharply and then returns to his room in the Stockade, though this time under his own power. Being thwarted is fucking _annoying._

 

Barry makes several hops around the land before finally making it to his cave. He lets out a sigh of relief when he makes it behind the wards, checking the main ward stone over and reinforcing the anti-reaper ones just in case. His new body is two months out from being completed, so he has to wait. He's used to that by now; he's not sure if that's a good thing or not. Merle would probably say that it is, but Merle isn't-- isn't _his_ Merle right now.

He decides to turn his attention to making the cave more comfortable, both for his corporeal and current form. In the past four and a half years he hasn't really bothered to do much with it besides 'decorate' it with the various maps and pins on the walls and tables. The tank provides most of the lighting, with only a few candles here and there in holders for alternate lighting. Barry eyes the candles thoughtfully and then begins experimenting.

Several half-exploded, melted-- and, on one memorable occasion, stuck upside-down to the ceiling but thankfully not dripping or extinguished –candles later, Barry has worked out floating and ever-burning candles that never burn or blow out. They float handily right above head-height when not being used and can be moved and placed as needed when they are.

With the lighting fixed, Barry sets about making the sleeping area more comfortable, snagging some thick blankets from his demiplane –and that's another thing he should probably sort out, as it's gotten very cluttered over the years –and putting them in the chest along with a good pillow. Cleaning up feels good, even if his current form can't really take advantage of it. It's something to do while he waits, if nothing else, and having something to keep his mind and hands, such as they are, busy does help for the most part.

He hums as he works, snippets of songs from a hundred different worlds flowing without thought. He may be one of the few that still can remember them right now, but Barry doesn't mind. At least it's something that he's been able to keep for himself in all of this mess.


	6. Year Six: You May Learn to Love Another

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter warning for mental and emotional manipulation, but nothing that's worse than Wonderland.

Barry wakes slowly, his head feeling like it's playing host to a hoard of rampaging giants. He's reclining on something soft but supportive; judging from the feel, probably a bed. He doesn't remember getting in a bed before he went to sleep, but then again, his memory's never been the best, so it's possible that he's rented a room in one of the better inns somewhere and passed out on the bed from... injuries? Drinking? He's not sure, and he supposes the only way to find out is to open his eyes.

He slowly opens his eyes, blinking blearily up at the ceiling above him. Barry sits up sluggishly, glancing around until he finds his glasses on the nightstand next to the bed. Putting them on only clarifies his vision but not his memory. He's in a rather simply decorated bedroom, one that could be in any inn of moderate quality or a guest room in a well-kept home. Barry gets out of his bed, finding that he's wearing plain cotton pajama pants and a t-shirt. It's nothing he would've objected to, so he figures either he's picked them out for himself or someone who knows him well has.

Either way, he's comfortable and clean, so that's a start, he supposes. Barry breathes a sigh of relief when he finds the dimensional store bracelet he's picked up over his travels clasped securely around his right wrist. He summons his wand, casts Dancing Lights to double-check that it still works, and then sends the wand back into the dimensional store. If nothing else, he'll be able to defend himself as needed.

Barry leaves the bedroom, his bare feet near-silent against the long rug that runs the length of the hallway outside his room. He finds a staircase down, and, figuring that down is probably a good idea, goes down carefully, his head still throbbing dully. It seems like he's in a house, judging from the decor and general layout, but the discovery doesn't exactly fill him with confidence. Barry can smell and hear food cooking in the kitchen. It's the first sign of life besides himself he's encountered so far.

He draws his wand, holding it tightly in his hand as he approaches the square arched entrance of the kitchen. There's the quiet sound of humming accompanying that of food frying, and from Barry can tell, it's a woman making the noise. Barry steps into the kitchen, preparing himself to demand answers, and then freezes. His wand clatters to the floor as the woman at the stove turns to look at him. He knows in his heart and soul who it is, even if her full name slips out of his mind like water through a sieve.

 

It's _Her_.

 

Barry stares. He can't help it. His gaze roams over her face as he drinks in her mismatched eyes, golden-brown skin with a darker brown smattering of freckles across her cheeks, nose, and brow, the quirk of her warmly amused smile as she brushes a rogue blond curl out of her face--

It's all too much. Barry pulls his focus away, bending down to pick up his wand. The woman laughs, the sound rich and fond.

“Interesting dreams last night, Bear?” she teases gently.

“I-- uh, y-yeah, L- L - babe,” Barry stammers as he puts his wand back in his dimensional store and then straightens up. “Weird ones. I-- hi. How, uh, how are you?” He can't get his mind to focus on her actual name, but any pet names seem to be fine. He eventually settles on 'Elle' for her. It's technically the first letter of her name, that much he knows and can comprehend, and it doesn't make his head hurt more than it already does, so it'll have to do.

“I'm good,” Elle says as she turns back to the pan on the stove. From what Barry can tell, she's scrambling some eggs, a baking rack of bacon drip-drying over a paper towel-lined cookie sheet on the counter near by. “Been up a little while. You hungry?”

Barry takes a seat on one of the stools that sit at the bar-style counter, wiping the remnants of sleep from his eyes. “Yeah, I could eat.”

He watches her cook, the feeling of contentment that rises in his chest warring with a sense of unease curling in the pit of his stomach. He can't... he can't remember how they'd gotten here, to this idyllic little house with its cozy environs. Everywhere he looks, Barry can see the comfortable mish-mash of belongings and styles that speaks of their long-term cohabitation. Trinkets litter the shelves that don't bear books, squashy pillows are tucked into the corners of the overstuffed couch, and there's even a small dual shrine of the Raven Queen and Istus set on a side table where the sun can strike it most of the day.

The meal passes in a sort of warm haze, with inconsequential bits of conversation shared over eggs, bacon, and coffee. Barry doesn't really keep track of the conversation, the words flowing in one ear and out the other. He helps wash the dishes up once the meal is over, Elle drying and then putting them away. She kisses him on the cheek in thanks once they're done, which earns a faint blush from Barry and a fond laugh from Elle.

“Still blushing after all these years, babe? Gods, I love you.”

Barry smiles, though the unease in his stomach doesn't dissipate. If nothing else, it intensifies, leaving him feeling queasy. It's unfortunate, given the delicious meal he's just enjoyed.

“Love you too. I... I think I'm gonna go take a walk,” he says, rubbing at the back of his neck. “I want to enjoy the nice weather we're having.”

Elle smiles. “Hell yeah. I'd join you, but 'Ko and I have plans.”

Barry nods. It's unsurprising. Elle's always spending time with her brother, but Barry doesn't begrudge them. It's been hard ever since-- since-- He shakes his head and then abandons the thought. It's easier and less painful that way. He goes and changes before getting his jacket from the coat rack and slipping it on, making sure his keys and wallet are tucked away in his dimensional store before heading out. He calls out a goodbye to Elle and then closes the door behind himself.

The weather is as perfect as suspected, the sky a deep blue with puffy white clouds and a warm sun shining down on him. Barry takes his time, meandering along the sidewalks until he reaches a park. He sees families scattered around the lush grassy areas, either playing games, setting up for early picnics, or just enjoying the sunshine as much as he is. There are people jogging along the paved paths that meander through the park, taking advantage of the good weather to get some exercise in.

Barry sticks his hands in his jacket pockets as he walks, the sunshine and fresh air helping soothe his constant low-level headache some. He returns home to an empty house, his breath catching in his chest when he calls out and no one answers. No. Elle is off with 'Ko. She's safe and sound and not-- not--

_Fuck._

Barry sinks down onto the couch and takes off his glasses, setting them aside before rubbing at his eyes hard with the heels of his hands. The world is even more blurry than usual when he opens his eyes again, exhaustion sweeping over him in a rush. Barry finds himself curling up on the couch, his bleary gaze focusing weakly on the shrine across the room. He falls asleep staring at the two familiar symbols, soothed by their presence in this strange world.

 

 

Barry wakes later in the day at the feel of Elle's fingers running through his hair. He stirs, a sleepy noise escaping him as he opens his eyes. He squints at her briefly before turning and snagging his glasses from the side table. He slides them on, blinking as his eyes refocus.

“Have a good nap?” Elle asks, not stopping the gentle slide of her fingers through his hair. Barry hums, pressing up into the touch like a cat. He's always been a sucker for having his hair played with, and Elle knows that all too well.

“Mmhm,” Barry murmurs, looking up at her. “Have a good time out?”

“Definitely. Me and 'Ko found a new spice shop downtown. I've got some blends I want to try out. You game?”

“For your cooking? Always.”

Elle smiles at that and then helps him up off the couch. Barry lets his weight settle on his feet and follows her into the kitchen. The evening passes companionably, and Barry can almost entirely ignore the vague unease simmering in his stomach. Dinner is great, as always, and the two of them clean up together once more, echoing their movements from earlier that morning. Elle puts on some music and hums along as she dries the dishes, her hips swaying gently to the beat.

Barry watches with a fond smile, eventually pulling her into a slow dance once her hands are empty and the dishes done, earning a laugh from his wife. Elle dances along with him, resuming her humming. Barry hums along as well, enjoying their closeness, both physical and otherwise. The dancing ends on a sweet kiss, which soon turns more spicy than sweet.

Luckily, the bedroom's not too far, so the two of them make their way there, stopping in the middle of the hallway to make out like teenagers for a minute or two before breaking apart with a shared laugh. Barry's nearly managed to forget about his unease, which he supposes is a good thing given what they're about to do. He undresses in no great hurry, having no need to impress. Elle knows what he looks like under his shirt and jeans, and still loves him regardless of his not as impressive physique as some might have.

He turns to look at her once he's fully undressed, and his brain short-circuits, but not in the good way. Something... something is off about his wife. He frowns, his brow furrowing as he tries to figure out what it is. Barry sweeps his gaze over her, starting from the top of her head and going downwards. Gorgeous hair? Check. Beautiful face? Check. Soft curves in all the right places, including her adorable stomach? Double check. A neat patch of hair over-- Over--

That's where his brain catches, doing the mental equivalent of a record scratch. He can't reconcile what he sees below Elle's waist, and he doesn't know _why_. It makes his head ache even more than usual, a sharp pain shooting through it. He sinks into a chair, clutching at his head as the pain increases. He can hear Elle say something, but Barry has no idea what it is. The pain rises to a point where Barry can't comprehend anything beyond a rush of white noise in his ears, and then--

Silence.

 

Barry rises from the withered remains of his body, arcs of scarlet magical energy grounding themselves on any available surface. He takes in the fact that he's in some sort of cave-- a necromancer's lair if his quick survey of the surrounding area is anything to go by -and then focuses on the two beings who are staring at him, their eyes wide. Barry stares back, his shadowy hands clenching.

Unlike Lup, whose anger burns hot and fast, Barry's anger is slow and cold, and that manifests in this form in the temperature rapidly dropping, frost riming the nearby metal tables.

“ _You used_ _ **Her**_ _against me_ ,” Barry growls, his form trembling and his voice gaining a deep and eerie resonance. “ _How_ _ **dare**_ _you._ ”

His magic lashes out, knocking the two necromancers unconscious. Barry looks around the lair, huffing sharply when he sees a half-empty potion bottle on a side table that's filled with Leira's Mists, a swirling gray liquid that looks like fog trapped in a bottle. Barry sneers at the sight. Whatever ritual they were planning on doing, the necromancers won't be around to finish it.

He tips a measure of the near-insubstantial potion into their mouths, forcing them to swallow it with a bit of magic before he leaves them to their fate. Once his body is taken care of and his belongings retrieved, Barry leaves the lair. He has no idea how long it's been since he was taken captive, but he knows one thing for sure:

He's _never_ letting this happen again.


	7. Years Seven through Nine: Maybe Your Friends Think I'm Just a Stranger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As per usual, all recognizable quotes (C) the McElroys/TAZ

Barry turns the focus of his research over the next few years to two things: one, trying to see if he can find Lucretia and Davenport again- the tracking charms on Merle, Magnus, and Taako are still going strong, thank the gods -and two, figuring out why he keeps getting drawn back to the area around Phandalin. The first comes to a head as Barry is returning from yet another failed search-and-death cycle.

He shudders as a weird sensation passes through the very core of his being. He immediately stops and looks around for the cause. Nothing around or below him seems to be suspicious, and when Barry looks up, he can see a few early evening stars and the two mo-

Barry stares up at the sky, taken aback and astonished by what he's seeing. Two moons. There are _two moons_ in Faerûn's skies, when he _knows_ there should only be one. Barry has to wonder just what Lucretia has fed Fisher to get this past people; maybe 'There has only ever been one moon'? Something like that, anyways.

Abandoning his intentions of returning to his cave, Barry wraps his magic around himself and goes invisible as he rises up into the air. He goes slow, heading towards the lower and seemingly larger of the two celestial bodies. After about a half hour or so, Barry finds himself drawing level with the 'moon'. It's only a half-sphere. The top half is flat and blanketed in rich green lawns where there aren't buildings or white paved walking paths. Barry manages to make it within five feet of the edge before he gets pushed sharply back by a crackling field of holy energy that has him hissing sharply. An anti-lich ward? The _fuck_?

He circles around the edge of the wards, freezing and then going visible when he spots Lucretia- or someone who _looks_ like Lucretia, anyways -running at a fast clip across the lawns. Barry hovers just at the edge of the ward's border as he watches her slow and then eventually come to a halt a few feet from the edge of the base. It's the closest they've been in nearly a decade, and Barry--

Lucretia is... older. If Barry was in his human form, they'd look a similar age. It's jarring to see her like this, with wrinkles of all things at the corners of her eyes and mouth, and it makes Barry's heart, such as it is, ache. All the words he's wanted to say to her over the years, all the anger and frustrations-- most of them drain away in the face of Lucretia's altered appearance, though the faint simmers of heartache still remain.

“L-Lup?” Lucretia breathes, her eyes wide with hope. Barry slowly shakes his head.

“Sorry, 'Cretia, but no. What... What _happened_ to you?” he asks. It's hard to miss the flash of disappointment and grief that passes across Lucretia's face when she hears his voice given how close they are to one another, but Barry ignores it for now.

Lucretia smiles bitterly.

“I ran afoul of a place called Wonderland out in the Felicity Wilds a few months ago. I never saw the people running it, but they have your Bell.”

“Th-the Bell doesn't do things like _this_ ,” Barry stammers, waving a shadowy hand at her.

“I don't think it was the Bell specifically, but whoever has it is powerful,” Lucretia tells him. “How.. How are you doing?”

“Well enough for being forced away from my family for almost a decade,” Barry snaps, and then sighs sharply. “I didn't come here to fight. I came here to see what the hell was going on. A second moon, Lucretia? Seriously?”

“Underground lairs are for supervillains and rebels,” Lucretia says, making Barry let out a surprised back of laughter.

“Gods, I'd almost forgotten about that.” He shakes his head, driving away the flood of memories that threatens to wash over him. “Look... Whatever it is you're planning, whatever you're doing? If it doesn't work out and we have to start all over again in a new cycle? I can't promise what my reaction will be. I'm still angry at you. You... you ripped away my family from me. You ripped away _Lup_ from me. I can't... I can't just forgive you for that.”

Lucretia sighed. “I know. I just... I'm sorry. Fuck, Barry, I really am. But...” She straightens her posture and then flexes the fingers of her left hand, summoning something from either a pocket dimension or her dimensional store with the gesture. Barry barely has time to realize that she still has the Staff before she thumps the end of it decisively against the stone of the walkway she's standing on.

There's a deep chime and a flash of light and then Barry's being _yeeted_ across the sky and away from the base. He manages to bring himself to a stop some miles away, feeling very discombobulated. Barry makes his way back home to his cave, just managing to go invisible before he's found by anyone. Right. This... this is going to take some careful planning.

The second part of his focus is turned towards Phandalin and why he's being continually drawn to it. Barry researches the history of the town and its area, eventually stumbling on stories about the Rockseekers and the vault deep in Wave Echo Cave. It sounds perfectly like somewhere Lup would take the Gauntlet to hide it to allow it to be sought but not obtained.

It takes some doing, but Barry manages to track down Gundren Rockseeker and starts up a casual letter exchange with him, introducing himself as a bodyguard and fighter for hire that specializes in dungeon delving who is looking for a new long-term job. Gundren warms up to him over time, and after a while agrees to hire him, asking him to come to Neverwinter so they can meet up and go over the plans.

Barry picks ups his recording coin with a Mage Hand, sighs, and then starts the recording.

“Hey there, bud. I know this is confusing as hell, but I need you to trust me. Your name is Barry Bluejeans, and I'm you from not too long ago. Your father's name was Gregor and your mother's name was Marlena...”

 

Gundren Rockseeker is... loud and brash. Something about him is weirdly familiar, though, and Barry's pretty sure he's never met the dwarf before, nor his brothers, who are similarly familiar but not so familiar. Gundren sends him out to buy two sturdy horses and some basic supplies, telling him that they'll get more supplies when they reach Phandalin.

Nundro and Tharden head out a day ahead of Gundren and Barry, supposedly to get everything set up at Phandalin so they can have some sort of base camp. Gundren rolls up the night before he and Barry leave for Phandalin, half-drunk on ale and saying that he's recruited some idiots to drive a supply wagon to Phandalin so they can get money for the goods it's carrying at the trader shop in town. Barry doesn't catch the names of said idiots- Gundren slurs through them, but it's a mess of half-caught syllables -though apparently one of them is his distant cousin.

Peachy.

Barry and Gundren set out early the next morning just after dawn breaks, the morning mists swirling around their horses' hooves. Barry likes the early mornings, especially when the sun starts to paint the sky fiery golds and reds. It's oddly comforting, a feeling of a long-earned promise that's on the cusp of being kept.

He shakes himself out of his contemplative stupor to direct his horse a little faster around a curve in the road, catching up with Gundren. “So,” he begins, “what do you think--”

An arrow whistling past him and striking Gundren's horse cuts him off, as do the sounds of harsh yells in Goblin-tongue. Barry barely has time to try to go for his sword before he's dragged off his panicking horse and hit over the head. Darkness consumes him, his head ringing like a bell until the sound is cut off with his descent into unconsciousness.

Barry comes to several times, eventually coming into sort of a fuzzy daze when he's thrown onto a rough stone surface. A cave floor, judging from the smells of moss, water, and general funk only a cave occupied by goblins can acquire. He groans but doesn't move, content to let the goblins' chatter wash over him as time slips past in fits and starts. They don't seem to be bothered with him too much, though they do strip him down to his undershirt and boxers for some reason only the gods can fathom.

Some time later- though Barry and time have an odd relationship when it comes to being able to tell its passing, even when he doesn't have a likely severe concussion and deep bruising over sixty percent of his body -he hears voices, ones that definitely don't belong to a goblin. His brain is just sluggish enough that processing what the voices are saying is nigh-on impossible, and after a while, the new voices go away, leaving just him and his captors. Barry sinks back down into near-unconsciousness, rousing maybe an hour later when he feels a warm hand against his chin and then the cool glass of a potion bottle being pressed against his lips.

He drinks the potion down, barely caring what it might be at this point, and then lets out a soft sigh of relief when he tastes cranberries and aloe. A healing potion then. Barry opens his eyes to see three people before him: an elf, a human, and a dwarf.

“This is - This is wonderful. Thank you. Thank you, you kind soul. I will never ever forget this kindness that you have done for me. My name is Barry J. Bluejeans, uh, and I'm ready to kick some goblin ass! Where did they go?”

Alright, they might not be the best lines, but Barry's pretty sure he can be forgiven for not exactly being Fantasy Broadway ready given the shitty day he's had. He finds himself in the back of a cart a few minutes later, listening to his three rescuers bicker back and forth. Of the three, Barry's attention is continually drawn to the elf. His speech patterns and face seem so familiar, but not quite... _right_ . Like a mirror inverted. It's weird and delightful and strange and _home_ all at once.

Barry shakes his head and then looks out the back of the wagon, watching the scenery go by. He's sure he has time to figure out what's going on.

Probably.


	8. Year Ten and Onward: For Ten Long Years I've Been in Trouble...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All recognizable dialogue is (c) the McElroys / TAZ. Thanks for sticking along with me on this journey!

Phandalin burns for one bright, fierce moment with the heat of a thousand dragons and then is extinguished, leaving nothing save for a rapidly cooling and perfect circle of obsidian. Only four living survivors leave the former town, having narrowly escaped the destruction due to hiding at the bottom of the town's well. They rise far up, up, and away from the scarred plain in a magical conveyance one of the group calls down from above, leaving it behind.

Near the center of the obsidian disc, a red robed figure laboriously rises, freeing itself from the confines of the volcanic glass. It stares up at the rising orb, its shadowy hands clenched at its sides. Red tendrils of magical energy spark off it, grounding themselves against the obsidian. The figure lowers its head and shudders, seemingly forcing itself to calm down. The magical energy crackling off it eventually peters out, as do the shudders running through the figure.

After a long moment, the figure disappears, leaving the ruins of Phandalin to cool.

 

Barry makes a bold move a month or so later. He's managed to find an employee of the Bureau of Balance, a rather blissed-out looking halfling who he gathers is named Robbie. Barry trails him around Neverwinter for a little while before following him out to the outskirts beyond the city. Much to Barry's great pleasure, Robbie calls down one of the transport spheres that will take him up to the moon base. Just before Robbie steps into the sphere, Barry mutters an apology and then possesses him, hitching a ride up to the moon base and past the anti-lich wards Lucretia has set up.

He does his best to play it cool, using the cues he picks up from the other Bureau employees as he and Robbie make their unassuming way through the base's corridors. He catches sight of a large screen showing some kind of race on it as he walks but ignores it until he hears one of the watchers say something about a cool thing Magnus is doing at that moment. Barry mentally swears. Of course. Of fucking _course._

Barry urges Robbie off into the depths of the base, eventually managing to find Lucretia's office. Time is against his side now. He sneaks into the office, breathing a sigh of relief when he finds it empty. Barry heads through a door in the back of the office, casting a detect magic spell on the doorknob just in case. He doesn't find anything, which surprises him. Surely Lucretia hasn't made it _that_ easy. The complex puzzle that waits on the other side of the door, however...

Barry grins. Now _this_ is more like it.

 

He almost makes it through the puzzle before he sets off an alarm. Barry feels bad about it, abandoning Robbie to his fate, but he knows he can't stick around. He lets the anti-lich ward throw him away from the base and then follows the draw of the tracking charms he has on the boys to track them down to Goldcliff. Barry catches up with them just before they meet up with Captain Bane.

There's something about the captain that immediately sets Barry on edge. Sure, he seems nice enough, but a hundred and ten years of dealing with people of all shapes and sizes has finely honed Barry's senses for bullshit and trickery, and Bane is setting them off like wildfire. Barry barely has a few seconds to act when he sees Bane covertly tip a few drops of something the bottle of brandy-wine before he serves the three Reclaimers up a drink. He quickly possesses him, far more roughly than he had Robbie, and forces Bane to dash two of the three cups to the ground and then down the last.

Barry might usually prefer peace when he can get it, but _no one_ fucks with his family like that.

He watches Bane fall to the ground with a pleased feeling before looking up at the boys, who are staring at him in surprise. Gods, he misses them. They look healthy enough given the hell of a race they just went through, with surprisingly only a few minor scrapes and bruises evident on their persons. Before Barry has time to speak, Magnus steps forward and tries to punch him several times.

Like always, it's fucking weird to feel someone's hands pass right through him. Barry has to hold back his laughter as Magnus tries to cut him in half with his axe, nearly missing Merle with the wide swing. Barry controls himself and then speaks, pitching his voice low and raspy. He doesn't know how much Fisher has wiped from their minds, if the sound of his true voice will cause any problems, so he does his best to disguise it, though to his perception, he just sounds like he has a bad sore throat.

“ _ **Are you afraid?**_ ”

He asks it several more times, though he can't resist making a stupid joke while he does. It's inevitable when he's around his family, and one of the things he misses the most about them. After a few rounds of noncommittal answers, Barry shakes his head.

“ _ **You do not know how to be afraid,**_ ” he says. Merle and Magnus crack a few more jokes before Barry extends one hand, displaying an illusion of several faces over his palm. He pulls the information lightly from their minds as he speaks, internally wincing at the intrusion. “ _ **Gundren Rockseeker. Magic Brian. Jenkins. Sloane. Captain Bane. This is the true nature of man. The want. The Hunger. It consumes everything it touches. It can't be stopped or changed. It's the end of everything. This is your first lesson.**_ ”

He needs them to understand the severity of what they're dealing with, even with most of their memories gone or muted or whatever it is that Fisher has done to them. Barry' intends to say more, but he can feel a scrying spell searching for him. Fuck. Lucretia must have figured out it was him who possessed Robbie.

Barry teleports away, but not without employing one of Lup's favorite tricks of conjuring a small and controlled spout of flame to mask his exit. He breathes a sigh of relief when he makes it back to his cave. It had been close, that's for sure, but he's saved those he loves for now.

 

Barry next goes to see Taako and the others on Candlenights. He's surprised to find them outside of the wards of the moon base. He follows them through Lucas' base unseen, keeping his magic wrapped tightly around himself even though he's invisible to all but True Sight. He is glad for his extra precautions given the events of the next half hour or so. Godsdamn reapers and their tenacious hunting. He doesn't fault the reaper for doing his job, but he doesn't particularly like the fact that Merle loses an arm because of it.

He takes his chance to come out of hiding when Lucas is showing off his cosmoscope. It's a brilliant work of resonance magics, and in any other case Barry would've loved to talk to him about it, but now's not the time. He waits until the perfect moment and then casts Time Stop on everyone except for his three friends and then clears his throat to mimic the question Magnus asked several minutes prior in Lucas's explanation.

“ _ **What's bigger than this?**_ ”

Barry knows the answer to that question intimately. So do Merle, Magnus, and Taako, even if they don't remember it. Magnus tries attacking him again- and seriously, didn't he learn the first time that isn't going to work -and then nearly makes Barry phase out of existence when he jokes around by stepping into him and says, “Oh ho ho, I'm in a red robe!”

Barry shivers and then floats upward, a bit of annoyance running through him. Goofs are great and everything, but he has limited time here and none of it for jokes.

“ _ **Okay, excuse me?**_ ”

Magnus just grins unrepentantly at him. “Uh huh?”

“ _ **Uh.. S'up? I spoke to you about the Hunger of all living things.**_ ”

“When?”

“ _ **Th-the last time, in the office building?**_ ”

Magnus looks puzzled for a moment before he remembers. “In the- Oh. Oh! With Captain Captain Bane.”

Barry does his best not to sigh. “ _**Yeah, he tried to poison you, but I st-** _”

“He tried to poison us?!” Magnus looks flabbergasted. Maybe his memory problems are worse than Barry's realized.

“I'm not remembering,” Merle adds, “that one is by me.”

“ _ **Well, take it on credit. I warned you about the Hunger of all living things.**_ ” Barry gestures at the representations of the planes that're still floating about. “ _ **This is the power it seeks. The power of creation itself. A billion billion lives have been devoured by this Hunger in pursuit of its power.**_ ”

“A billion billion?” Magnus asks, his eyes wide.

“ _ **Yes,**_ ” Barry confirms.

“That's a lot.”

This time Barry does sigh. “ _**It sure is.** _” He waves his hand again, summoning a disc of black opal from a trash bin. The following illusion might be a bit overkill, but Barry knows that dramatics are one of the best ways to get through to them, even in a state like this.

“ _ **There is no more running. There is no escape. This world is life's last chance,**_ ” he tells them. Magnus gives him a puzzled look.

“Who _are_ you?”

Barry just shakes his head. “ _**It's not time for me to tell you that yet.** _ _”_ And gods, does that make his soul ache. “ _**You three are the on-** _ ” Barry pauses when he sees what Taako is holding and goes completely still. “ _**T-Taako? Taako, where did you find that umbrella?** _”

“Yeah, I took it off this, uh... I took it off this dead thug in a red robe. The dead guy, he had a red robe,” Taako replies nonchalantly.

“ _ **You f- you- you-**_ ” His mind is a blur of white noise as he tries to process what Taako's told him. Barry barely hears the talking as he shudders, magic crackling through his form. Eventually he manages to speak again, but it takes the last of his control. “ _ **Wha- What? Where di- What did you- You**_ _ **FOUND**_ _ **HER**_ _ **?**_ ”

He can't take it any more. Barry teleports away to his cave, his control the shakiest it's been in years. Lup... Lup is dead? And Taako found her skeleton? But what happened to her after she died? She would've been in lich form, sure, but that wouldn't have stopped her from coming back to them, to _him_ , unless something further happened to her.

The question is, what?

 

It takes some time before Barry is fully back in control of himself. Longer than he cares to admit, if he's honest. As he recovers, a wild thought occurs to him. The Umbra staff absorbs the power of defeated magic users, right? And a lich is made up of pure magical energy with a soul fused into the cracks. So maybe... maybe Lup's not so much dead as trapped. Freeing her... Freeing her is going to be tricky if that's the case. Barry highly doubts Taako will just give up the staff, and he has no idea how to go about getting Lup out of it without destroying it, assuming that will even work.

Of course, that assumes that Lup _is_ trapped in the staff. Barry's relatively sure she didn't proof against the idea that either of them would somehow be defeated by the staff, so it's possible that she's there... somehow. Barry tries not to dwell on the specifics too much. It's easier that way.

By the time Barry's fully recovered, it's near summer. He's out doing some more research when he feels the tracking charms he's been carrying for the past few years stutter continually, like a candle flickering in the wind. Feeling worried, Barry follows the trail to a shimmering dome of magic deep in the desert. The moment he presses an invisible hand against the dome, he knows it's being created by the Chalice.

Well, shit.

Barry has no idea how long this'll take, but he's had years to hone the art of being patient. He passes the time by watching the guy who's puttering around with the largest cannon Barry's ever seen. After about forty-five minutes or so, the bubble wavers as a hole opens up in it, releasing first a flaming mine cart, followed by the three Reclaimers and then a giant purple worm. Barry watches Magnus pull Cannon Guy down to the ground as the purple worm sails over them.

Once the worm is gone, Barry casts a localized Time Stop around Cannon Guy and then pops into sight behind him so that the boys can see him. He lifts one finger to the rough approximation of where his mouth would be in his corporeal form before using the other hand to cast a silencing charm around their Stones of Far Speech.

“ _ **Did you retrieve the Cup?**_

Magnus nods. “Yes.”

Barry steadies himself. “ _ **What did you change?**_ ”

He has to keep himself from doing a little dance when both Taako and Magnus say that they haven't changed anything. Barry has to make doubly-sure just in case, though.

“ _ **You didn't use the Cup?**_ ”

There's a second confirmation that has Barry feeling amazing.

“ _ **I'm really proud of you. I thought there was a chance that maybe this would eb the one to end your adventure,**_ ” he says.

“Wait, you're proud of-- hold on, you're the Red Robe, right? You're one of the bad guys,” Magnus says, looking confused.

Barry freezes. “ _ **Who told you that**_?”

His heart aches when he hears their replies. Lucretia... Gods, what a foolish, foolish... Barry sighs.

“ _ **I need to know- do you trust me?**_ '”

The denials hurt worse than being called the bad guy. His family doesn't trust him? Barry can feel his spectral form start to shudder and shake, red bolts of magical energy whipping off of him. He barely notices Merle dodging out of the way as he sinks to the ground, his control thin.

“Lup, they don't trust me,” he murmurs in his usual voice, both for himself and for the possibility that Lup can hear him in the staff. “I can't do it any more, Lup. I'm sorry.”

Barry shakes his head. No. He needs to see this through to the end. He can't... Lup won't want him to give up. Barry gathers himself, ruthlessly pushing down the bitterness and despair, and rises back up into the air again.

“ _ **The next time we meet, I will need you to trust me completely and absolutely. Otherwise, all of this will have been for nothing. The Hunger is almost here, and when it arrives, this world will be lost.**_ ”

He goes invisible but lingers around the town, watching as time reasserts itself and seven years play out in fast-forward. When the bubble falls, Barry takes a quick tour of the town, noting with some surprise the statue near its entrance. He finds Magnus just as June gives him a tube, and Barry recognizes it as one architects commonly store their plans in.

Barry reaches out with a touch of magic, just enough to link his and Magnus' minds to say, “ _ **Magnus- if you open that tube, Magnus, it's going to be harder for me to protect you.**_ ”

Magnus' short, sharp answer is all Barry needs to steel his resolve. He's going to see this to the bitter end no matter what.

 

Barry keeps a closer eye on things after that. He still can't get up on the base, but his tracking charms are still going strong, so when he feels them go towards the Felicity Wilds, he books it over as fast as he can. He shivers when he feels the strong necromantic magic suffusing the area. Keeping stringently unseen, he follows his friends into the large tent.

What follows has him trembling in a mixture of anger and fear. He supposes he could take down these two liches relatively easily, but they have his Bell, which makes it nearly impossible on his own. Barry watches the first round pass, and then, while Taako and then Merle take their turns spinning the Wheel of Chance, he darts over to Magnus and prays to all the gods he can think of that the fighter remembers Thieves' Cant.

It's something they learned early on in their trip across the planes, wanting a way to communicate with one another that didn't draw too much attention. Barry carefully draws Magnus into a short conversation, telling him to keep his presence there a secret and that the room is one room that magically transforms before telling him to wait for his signal.

The next round is... baffling. Some sort of weird dating-style show that has no true participants. Barry uses his time wisely, consuming as much of the necrotic energy in the atmosphere that he can without giving himself away. He pauses when Taako casts Tasha's Hideous Laughter on the mannequin behind the curtain, not quite sure what his brother is doing. Taako's fingers flick subtly towards Magnus, and suddenly the younger man- though not so younger looking now -seems to stare right at Barry.

Barry stares at him, realizes what Taako's done, and then places a finger against his mouth. He can work with this. The next few rounds are still hard as fuck, but once they get to the boss rush room, Barry sets to work behind the pile of discarded mannequins as the fight rages on the other side of the room, doing his best to ignore the sounds of battle. He glances over at Magnus when he sees him move closer, holds up a hand to stop him, and then returns to his work.

Conjuration has never been his best talent, and he's working with what seems to be a strict time limit here, but Barry's determined to do his best and get them the hell out of here. He can't quite control what it is he's conjuring, especially since he keeps getting distracted by the noises coming from the other side of the room. The portrait of Lup in the dress she was wearing at Legato makes Barry pause for a long second before he banishes it, and finally-

_Finally_ he gets a door. Barry turns and waves frantically at Magnus, cluing him in to get himself and the others the fuck out of there. Barry stares at the wizard hat-wearing T-Rex that bounds his way- only Taako; gods, he loves his brother -breathing a sigh of relief when Merle and- is that a _head_? -are dropped off before Taako shifts back to his usual form.

Barry follows the others through the door and out of the chamber, letting the conjuration go. He's tempted to make himself known, but he doesn't know where the other liches are, and that worries him. There's no use in giving away the advantage of his presence so early.

He trails after the others, stopping a few feet away from the stage. The mannequins are eerie. Like bad horror movie eerie, and Barry hates them. They remind him of the Judges, all emotionless blank faces and parodies of life. After a minute or two, the two liches appear just out of sight of the stage, one of them holding the Bell. Barry stares at them as they speak, his fists balled up near his sides.

His anger turns into shock as the Bell is rung and he sees Magnus' body stumble as his soul is ejected out of it. That's- that's not what he originally designed the Bell to do, but somehow the liches-- Edward and Lydia, is it? --have managed to make it happen. What happens next is one of the most beautiful things Barry has ever witnessed, and it just speaks to the depths of the bonds between Taako, Magnus, and Merle, even if they don't remember them.

Sure, Magnus is in a mannequin's body now somehow, but they can worry about that later. There's always the cloning setup Barry has, so as long as there's enough of a genetic sample left once the fight's over, they can get Magnus back to where he belongs. Assuming, of course, that they can beat the Hunger first, or, failing that, run away to another plane to continue the interrupted cycles.

Barry hopes it doesn't come to that. He's tired of running.

The fight that follows is tough. Hard as nails. Fucking horrible. Barry has to focus on countering Lydia's attacks while the boys fight Edward!Magnus, and he can't help but cheer when Magnus channels the divine energy Merle's infused him with through his lance and expels Edward from his body. It gets even better when the Umbra staff sucks Edward up like a straw and then--

Barry can't help but grin, even if no one else can see it. The bouncing around the staff does? He's pretty sure that's Lup helping kick Edward's ass for hurting Taako. Once they manage to extract her from the wand, he'll have to ask her just what she did to the asshole.

It's all over a few minutes later, with Edward and Lydia gone and Magnus... Well, they'll have to figure out some alternative for him eventually. There has to be enough hair or whatever in his room back on the moon base to get him a new body, right?

Wonderland dissolves around them, leaving them to blink in the fading sunlight of the day. Barry hovers awkwardly at the edge of the clearing, having moved away from the others to give them space. Magnus storms over to him and swings a mannequin arm at him, but Barry catches it easily. Once the others are done talking to one another, Barry starts to lead them back to his cave. A few miles in, he stops and then turns to his three companions.

“I don't blame you for not trusting me right now, but I promise everything's gonna make sense real soon,” he says, not bothering to disguise his voice.

“I literally have nothing to lose, so, like, sure,” Magnus says dully, making Barry wince. A crackle of static reminds him of the Stones of Far Speech, and after a few tense moments, he's managed to convince the others to give them up and let him destroy the communication devices. Just as he shatters them, an ominous rumble of thunder rolls out overhead, making him jump.

“That was... close. I- I forgot about that. About your Stones. Listen, there's not much time. Night's gonna fall soon and we need to make some headway before it does because... Well, tomorrow's going to be... fateful.” Barry looks at Magnus. “Oh, I forgot something else.”

He makes a note on his message coin to disguise Magnus once he's back in his body and then continues the trek through the Wilds. They camp out near the road to Phandalin for the night, Barry keeping an unsleeping watch on the others as they rest. In the morning, they make it through the woods and to Barry's cave, much to his relief. He pauses in front of his cloning tube and stares at the small dual shrine to Istus and the Raven Queen that's tucked away in a corner of the cave for a brief moment as he contemplates what to say.

“Events that've been in motion for over a decade are about to reach critical mass. There are gaps in your stories that are unimaginably massive, but before the end of this days, I promise you they will be filled.” He gestures at the tank. “I- I acquired this invention years ago, and I've used it to recreate my physical form several times in pursuit of my goal. I've come close, but I've never reached that goal. It's because once I'm in my body, I'm gonna forget all the truths I know now in my lich form. And I can try to convince myself to follow my own commands...” He laughs roughly. “But, well... I can be pretty stubborn. And I also don't have any of my potent magical abilities in my body 'cause I'm not gonna remember the fact that I'm a lich at all.”

He knows he's rambling, but this is important for them to understand. Barry looks over at Magnus and continues on. “Magnus, I see your wheels spinning, but I'm... I'm sorry, it takes months for this device to grow a new body and... we don't have months, fellas. We have hours. I'm gonna... I'm gonna go into that tank and into my body, and then the four of us are gonna head back to the Bureau of Balance and we're gonna get the truth that we deserve. And it's gonna be...” He sighs. “Uncomfortable here in a bit, perhaps, 'cause you're gonna recognize me but I'm not gonna recognize you, so... I apologize in advance for my rudeness. If we all follow my commands, we will be successful. I have been planning this for some time and believe wholeheartedly in my preparations.”

Barry heads towards the tank, and just as he's about to sink into his body, he remembers something and pokes his head out. “Hey, Merle? Would you be a bud? I'm, uh, I'm gonna be as naked as a jaybird when I come outta here. Can you fetch me a change of clothes from that chest?”

“Be glad to, buddy,” Merle replies. Barry nods and then sinks back into the tank, dropping into his body for the last time.

 

Barry's having a weird fucking day. First, he wakes up naked, wet, and in a cave somewhere, then he has to deal with three strangers staring at him before he's allowed to get dressed, and now...

Now he's sitting in some sort of extra-dimensional space inside a.- what did that Taako guy call it, a pocket spa? -eating tiny cucumber sandwiches while he's being transported... somewhere. He's not sure where. The sandwiches are nice, he supposes, and the spa is pretty dang comfortable, though kind of cramped. He can sort of hear what's going on from the outside, but it's muffled.

Barry's not too fussed, even with the odd questions Taako throws at him on occasion. It's not like Barry knows anything. His brain's got more holes in it than Swiss fuckin' cheese. Answers are pretty much beyond him at the moment beyond the general 'Do I exist?' and, 'Should I have another cucumber sandwich?' (The answer to the latter is, of course, yes, while he's not always entirely sure of the first).

He drops his half-eaten sandwich when the room suddenly goes pitch dark. And cold. And... Barry shudders. Gods, it's horrible. It's like being sucked into a black hole but without the horrible death and--

“ _It's a trick, dummy_!”

Barry yelps, the darkness immediately fading away. He's not sure what just happened, but he's not alone and cold and dark and-- He shakes his head. He's alright, for a given value of alright. That kind of turns to shit when he feels a wave of magic pass through him. Truth. He's gotta... He's gotta tell the truth.

“Hey, I'm hidin' in this guy's bag and I'm getting' kinda claustrophobic, and also I'm not supposed to be up here!” he calls out as he heads towards the entrance of the pocket spa. A few physics-defying moments later and he's out in the real world again, standing awkwardly in a hallway while Taako and Merle talk with some kid about bad guys and going against the Bureau and... Barry's really not paying too much attention, to be honest.

He follows them into an office. It's a nice place, Barry supposes, and way neater than the cave he woke up in. He absently takes a flask when it's handed to him and drinks some of it before filling his own from the tank that has the cute little-- little--

Barry groans and slumps to the ground, barely having the presence of mind to cap his flask and put it in his pocket. He grabs at his head as his memories reassert themselves, and then looks up at Merle and Taako.

“Boys, don't- don't try to remember too fast. It's- it's – it'll take you out. M-Merle, can you do somethin' about that holy symbol, please, before, before--”

He gasps when Merle grabs the holy symbol from its disc and the anti-lich ward is deactivated. Thank fuck for that. Guards start arriving and he yells out to the others.

“Boys, don't put up a fight. It's – things are in motion now, and we just kinda gotta go with the flow, but-- You're gonna start remembering soon, but just take it slow, please. I'm begging you. You gotta take it slow.”

He doesn't have much time to do anything else before the guards drag them off to the Director in her Relic destroying chamber. Barry manages to break away from his guards long enough to try to charge at Lucretia, but Davenport stops him. Barry's hesitant to hurt his captain even now, so he eventually subsides, but not before saying one last thing as he subtly passes him the flask with the ichor.

“ _Drink_ ,” he murmurs, adding some magical weight behind the compulsion. He watches Davenport drink and then turns to Lucretia, urging her to help explain to the others what's going on so the remembering isn't as bad.

Everything's a blur after that. The battle, Lup's glorious return, the Hunger finally, _finally_ being defeated-- It all passes so quickly that Barry barely has time to breathe, let alone think. When everything is said and done, Barry crashes hard. He and Lup find a quiet area under some trees. Barry barely manages to sink down onto the gloriously green and plush grass before he passes out, magical and physical exhaustion getting the better of him.

 

Life gets better as time passes. This is home now, for better or for worse. Barry strikes a deal with Kravitz to allow him to use his cloning tube one last time for Lup. The night that his wife emerges from that tube is an amazing one. After their enthusiastic reunion, Barry finds himself laying on the bed in the cave that's served as his home for over ten years now, Lup tucked up firmly against his side, her arm draped over his torso.

He lays there in a content silence, thinking about all the things that're to come. He and Lup have jobs as reapers for the Raven Queen, and both are looking forward to it. It'll definitely be a change from any of the careers they've had before. Barry wonders if Istus has had a hand in ensuring they don't get sent to the Eternal Stockade but decides against questioning his good luck.

“Hey, babe?”

Barry hums, turning his head so he can nuzzle at Lup's hair, breathing in her familiar scent.

“Why is there a candle stuck upside-down on the ceiling?”

Barry can't help but laugh, the sound warm and true as it fills the cave where he's spent so many lonely nights. Life is finally, _finally_ back on track, and he intends to savor it as much as he can in the time he's been given. And if Barry has any say in it? That's going to be for many years to come.


End file.
